Monthly Archives: October 2006

Managment speak and how to shoot yourself in the foot

I had another interview on friday. It didn’t help that due to the fact that I still don’t own a computer I am badly out of practice in the things I did at uni in Computer Science. I’m geeky enough that I did used to know the bubble sort algorithm off by heart but when asked to come up with it under pressure, I crumbled like fine wensleydale.

I don’t and can’t really blame anyone but myself for my lack of preparation, so I didn’t so much shoot myself in the foot as machine gun most of my lower body away (metaphorically). But it does suck that I can’t really improve my skills without a computer and I can’t afford the computer without the better paid job. Grr, in the meantime back to temp central.

Temp Olympics

Today at work we ended up in a Hold Your Breath face off challenge. My best time was 1:20 but fellow temp Neil managed 1:30. The best thing was it was completely silent (except for my sharp intake of breath), so aside from looking stupid and turning blue I attracted no attention from Those In Charge whatsoever. Or if anyone noticed my abnormal behaviour they were to polite to say

Alan Mcgee & Tim Burgess

I went to Zanzibar (club not island) yesterday night to see Alan McGee the founder of Creation records and Tim Burgess of The Charlatans DJing. T’was a quality night and much fun had by all but myself and Kt were definitely at the lower end of the age spectrum. Suffice to say silly dancing and sweating were the order of the day.

Sorry that I don’t have time to blog much at the mo


The office politik and my cold have both slackened off, leaving me much better, though I had a sore head from the pub last night (I think a bad pint was genuinely to blame).

Congratulations to all who have found my myspace, it’s not that hard y’know

Other imaginary friends

Because the fascists in our office seem to have instituted a "no talking if you’re a temp" rule (apparently it’s okay if you have a contract), I’m forced to invent yet more imaginary friends for myself. My latest is Tyrone The God of Photocopiers and Other Facsimilie Devices. Tyrone’s altar is a large slab of plastic with the words Lexmark 3000 written on it.

Judging by the fact that the photcopier breaks on average once a week, I have decided that Tyrone is a vengeful and angry god who must be appeased with sacrifices of doughnut crumbs and used staples.

Okay this blog entry is bordering on the heretical and slightly mad, so I’ll stop there.

I get a myspace and gets some friends (both real and imaginary)

Sorry not much time for blogging at the moment. I’m on myspace now as well, try to find me and we can become "friends", but probably not, because my hobbies include sulking and hating people (I only joined myspace because most of the rest of my church use it).

I’ve been inventing imaginary friends for myself at work in order to releave the boredom of my job. My favourite imaginary friend is Jeffery Mulliner The Human Colander. He’s a quiet chap who sits by the water cooler and spends the day washing peas in his concave body, nobody apart from me ever really notices him but he’s a good laugh when you get to know him better